Monday Morning Madness with Ed!

I'm happy to announce that "Ed Williams" is back with us again this week! I had to skip Monday Morning Madness with Ed last week because I was sick and for that I apologize to you (My Readers) and to Ed. I know you can't wait for him to get started, so I'll stop talking now and give him the floor! Ed? Are you Ready?

Dull Crap Becomes Important Crap When You Get Older!

God, I’m almost embarrassed to write this article, as I’m really gonna be telling on myself in a major way…..

I have to do it, though. It’s too late for me to be rescued from my own fate, but perhaps it will help someone out there avoid the same in years to come. Hey, it might even be used to aid in the cause of anti-aging research, at least I hope it will.

Bottom line, the reason for today’s article is both simple yet profound. It’s also undeniable. So, without further ado, our reason for being here today is:

I’m finding, as I get older, that I want to talk about drivel, stuff that in years past I’d never have mentioned to anyone. I’d not have found it important or interesting enough.

Bear with me, it’ll make more sense in a few, unfortunately. This past Saturday, I needed to get the oil changed in my truck. Around 2 pm or so, I ran it over to the garage that does such things for me. And since Ole Black (my ’98 Toyota Tacoma that I love more than God) was a bit on the dirty side, I whipped her into a car wash and cleaned her up a bit. Then, we both went home.

As soon as I arrived and walked in the front door, my son Will asked where I’d been? I then proceeded to launch into a long, impassioned explanation of how I’d just taken my truck in for an oil change. That wasn’t enough, though. Then I launched into yet another impassioned recounting of how I took Ole Black for a good washing afterwards. And as I was telling Will all this stuff, the thought hit me, “Just how boring is this? And why do I give a damn about giving him such a long-assed explanation of either item?”

Right at that point it didn’t bother me too much, but about an hour or so later my son-in-law Dave walked up. He mentioned that he’d noticed I’d been gone earlier, and wondered why? I then launched into yet another impassioned speech about how I’d taken Ole Black in for an oil-change and a car wash. And as I heard myself get yet again into all this detail about two such mundane events, the reality of what I was actually doing hit me, and my mind screamed out,

“We’re getting old, dammit! Oil changes are now a big deal So are car washes! Look at us, we’re getting mossy and mentally skanked!”

The bad thing about it all was, my mind was telling me the truth. I am getting old, and that’s a sure tell tale sign of it, getting long-winded about trivial crap that even a tse-tse fly couldn’t care less about. And if I’m already caring about car washes and oil changes, then the following things are probably on the horizon:

• Talking to my neighbors about their favorite garden fertilizers and why.

• Discussing out loud stuff like dry skin or scalp flaking problems and what the best means of addressing them are.

• Discussing what types of vitamins best promote good health.

• Getting into earnest discussions with my male friends about toupees vs. the natural (bald as a damn eagle) look.

• Arguing that music was only music back when it was on vinyl, not on these damn MP3 computer files that are so prevalent today.

• Bemoaning the loss of pay phones and empathizing with the postal service’s current problems.

• Whispering under my breath to my male neighbors about how the lady down the street does yard work in far too skimpy outfits.

If I start getting verbally long-winded on any of those things, especially that last item, then I’ll know I’m getting older than the pyramids and that I might as well start hiking my pants up under my armpits. I’ll truly know that old age has set in, and that park benches and clogging in those awful square dancing outfits are in my future. A future even more dismal than being given the complete works of Perry Como in MP3 format, and that should make any adult with a reasonable set of eardrums moan the blues.

Time to wrap this up, my friends. I know this week’s article was pretty much a downer, but y’all will be much happier with next week’s. In next week’s epistle we’ll talk about why prunes are an incredibly wonderful food, why they’re misunderstood, why our elected officials ought to aggressively promote them to their constituents, why Post should start making “Prune Toasties,” why……


"ChristmaSin'", his new Christmas novel, comes out in Nov. of '09!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_wQu3_9vvig you tube for a ChristmaSin

Author Site: www.ed-williams.com
Publisher: www.champagnebooks.com
Follow Ed on Twitter: www.twitter.com/ELW3


KISSES ~ x0xx

A Little About Piggy Paint and It's Founder

How did PIGGY PAINT Start? Well, I thought before I talked about my Review of PIGGY PAINT and their fabulous GIVEAWAY, you'd like to know a little bit about the company!
Well here it is! All you need to know about the founder and the PIGGY PAINT company itself ... (for now)!

My name is Melanie Hurley, founder of Piggy Paint™. I am a stay-at-home mom with two very fancy little girls, ages 2 and 4, who love to have their fingernails painted. I’ve always hated the thought of my kiddos putting their hands in their mouths after I painted their nails with traditional kid polishes. Not only did the ingestion of the chemicals worry me, but the smell nearly left me light-headed after painting two sets of fingernails and toenails.

One day while we were painting nails over a foam plate, my daughter dropped a glob of her solvent-based polish onto the plate. Shortly after, the paint began to bubble and “ate” through the plate. I looked in dismay at the hole in the plate and decided to test all of her other “kid” polishes on the foam. Within minutes, ALL of the solvent-based polishes began to bubble and eventually left big holes in the plate. From that day on, I decided that any flammable substance that could eat through foam was unacceptable for my children’s fingernails, which would inevitably end up in their mouths.

My quest was on, and Piggy Paint™ was born. As you may have guessed, our polish is NOT flammable and sits beautifully on the unaffected foam. We hope you enjoy this water-based polish that is specially formulated of natural ingredients. Finally, a kid-friendly polish without the accompanying drawbacks of traditional polishes. It is free of formaldehyde, toluene, phthalates, biphenyl A, ethyl acetate and acetone... and made in the USA!

From my heart to yours, I hope Piggy Paint™ takes the worry out of painting your little one’s nails and puts the fun back into this enjoyable activity you can share with your daughter and other precious girls in your life.

(taken from the Piggy Paint Site w/ permission)

FAQ's About PIGGY PAINT!

Is there anything toxic in the nail polish?
No. There are no toxic chemicals. The resins are polyacrylic and polyurethane latexes with residual monomers well below 100 parts per million. The only co-solvent is a diglycol ether. All colorants are FDA-certified for cosmetic use.

What should be done to prepare nails before putting on the polish?
Simply, clean nails with Piggy Paint Nail Polish Remover or soap and water. Healthy nails naturally produce a mixture of oils and proteins, which serve to protect, beautify and enhance their appearance. Normal nail polishes remove these substances from the nails, requiring the user to prepare their nails with other products. However, since Piggy Paint Nail Polish is a waterborne polish, it does not remove the oils so your nails remain strong and healthy.

How long will it take for my nails to dry?
Piggy Paint dries to a tack-free state nearly as fast as regular polish, though it takes longer to reach its ultimate hardness. We recommend using multiple thin coats since they will dry faster than one thick coat. If your hands are cold, the temperature is cool, or there is high humidity in the area, it may take longer for the coats to dry. For maximum chip resistance, use the following application instructions:

Wash hands with soap and water.
Apply 2 -3 thin coats of Piggy Paint™.
Air dry 60 seconds.
Blow dry polished nails for 1 minute with hair dryer set on warm heat/low blower setting. For safety purposes, please follow manufacturer’s instructions on blow dryer and always monitor your child.

Find ALL FAQ's HERE!



KISSES ~ XXX